Jokes from Jersey!

Peter Walsh was the Commodore of the St Helier Yacht Club where he gave tremendous support to the Clipper Race. After Peter met His Excellency, Tony Siddique in Singapore in 2002 I was subsiquently asked to present him with a burgee from the Riau Yacht Club* (RYC) next time I visited Jersey. Just as I was about to publish the photo some inky swot was impertinent enough to point out there was one unfortunate thing awry with the picture. This resulted in one of my early and desperate learning exercises in Paintshop Pro. All was resolved ….

* The Riau Islands are a group of about 3000 islands belonging to Indonesia, just south of Singapore. During SARS the Clipper Race visited Batam which was where the HQ of the RYC is based

Peter has been kind enough to forward the following two stories:

An old sea Captain was sitting on a bench near the wharf when a young man walked up and sat down. The young man had spiked hair and each spike was a different color.... green, red, orange, blue, and yellow.
After a while the young man noticed that the Captain was staring at him. "What's the matter old timer, never done anything wild in your life"
The old Captain replied, "Got drunk once and married a parrot. I was just wondering if you were my son!"

From the dock the woman watched as the salty old tugboat captain skillfully docked his boat. She was impressed that such an old man would still be doing such a tough job. She decided to wait until the captain disembarked. As he did, she asked him, "Captain, what is your secret to leading such a long and productive life?"
"Well," he said. "I would have to say it's because I smoke three packs of cigarettes a day, drink a case of whisky every week, eat a lot of fatty foods and I never exercise."
"Wow, that's amazing," the woman said. "exactly how old are you?"
He answered, "Thirty-one"